wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
