I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Randomize
