So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
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