Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Randomize
