garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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