Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
