So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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