We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
