In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
