cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
