the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
