After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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