How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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