okay pat passed out under dana's car
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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