he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
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