mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
