So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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