I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
