I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
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