1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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