He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
