Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Randomize
