is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
