But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
