that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize