I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
