I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
