I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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