Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
