Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
