Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I smell stomach acid.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
So much rum. So many feels.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
