No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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