Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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