Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
vagina is talking i cant
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
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