Your tits are I can't wait for
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
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