Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
