True but thats because hes a fetus.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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