is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
