their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
