The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
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