If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
