So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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