I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
