In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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