I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
