I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I am available for nakedness
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Randomize
