i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
