what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
