Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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