Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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