I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Randomize
